A California Republican

Here’s the thing that my mother always told me growing up: Don’t embarass me because your conduct reflects on me. My mom also told me lots of other things. But that’s one of the big lessons she taught me about respect and things  - that your conduct reflects on your parents.

So the other day I took my young (8 months) son to the neighborhood park. It’s not a big park. But it has  aplay structure and some baby swings. He like to be in the swings, be outside, play with the trees, bark, and kind of feel his way around the play structure without gonig down any of the slides. So we go there a few times a week and play.

It just so happened that this time we went at 3pm. The local high school lets out around then, but I didn’t think anything of it. Until the little wanna-be hoodlums started showing up. And before you criticiae me for calling them wanna-be hoodlums let me tell you about them. They were swaggering. Not walking - swaggering. They were smoking - pot and tabacco. And their language was horrible. I spent some time in the military so I know about bad language. But this was worse. I mean, every other word was a swear word that help no meaning except to say it. They sat down at the one picnic table and continued to be punks. Until one of them noticed me. Then he said in a really loud voice so I could hear, “Don’t be using language like that around a kid man.” I laughed.

They know that such language is inappropriate. Otherwise they wouldn’t have made that comment and apologized to me. If they thought they were behaving the way they should behave, then they wouldn’t have changed their behavior.

So when they started smoking, I asked them to quit. In CA you aren’t allowed to smoke in parks where kids are around - and regardless of what they think those kids are kids still. They asked me why I should care if their parent’s don’t care. I thought to myself that their parents probably do care. But I told them that they are still kids, and they should stop smoking because they are killing themselves and when they are sick, older, and unable to hold a job, it is my tax money that has to go into caring for them. They told me they were adults and could take care of themselves. I asked if they had jobs, and how they would provide for themselves. They said they could get welfare. Then that group left.

The next group that showed up was more aggressive, sitting on the play structure and the swings while we were playing there. I asked them to leave and one 15 year old kid pushed me around. I mean - this was a big kid. I am 5′1” and I had my son with me. So they were pushing me around. So I called the cops (well the sherriff). They came and took care of things. They took everyone with tabacco or pot downtown. I didn’t press charges, I just wanted a scare t be put into them.

But here’s the thing - WHERE ARE THE PARENTS?!?!?

I cannot imagine doing something like that as a teenager. Don’t get me wrong - I got in plenty of trouble. But I always knew there was a price to pay for it. These kids had no concept of consequences. And they would respond that the state would give them money on welfare? I mean, what are the parents teaching these kids? What does this say about the state of parents?

Don’t parents care anymore? I understand it can be frustrating, and the desire to give up because things won’t get better. I know it is hard to always be fighting with your kid. I know, as a kid, its hard to always be fighting with your parents. But someone has to teach these kids lessons: responsibility, respect, working hard and getting around in life. Without these, the kids are doomed to fail. They are going to feel entitled to things, and end up not getting them because they don’t work for it. What are the youth learning?

These are the people who are going to be voting in a few years? I don’t want them voting. They will vote to raise taxes because they survive on state benefits. Not because they have to, but because they can. Because they feel no need to work if someone else will pay them not to work. They are going to end up with a lot of health care for smoking, or in jail because pot is a gateway drug.

I don’t understand this type of kid. I would never have acted in that manner. The wrath of God would have come down on me (in the form of my mother) should a cop have called her to tell her I was in trouble. She would be concerned for my safety first, but then the wrath would come. I was scared of that. I didn’t want to have that kind of discussion/fight with her - so I never did anything to provoke that.

I was never using such language in large chunks. I knew it was bad language - and so did those kids. But I also knew it made me look stupid. My mom took care to teach me that swearing when you stub your toe, slam your finger in the door, lock your keys in the car ….. that’s all fine for an instant. Then get back to the normal words of a language. I just don’t understand the constant use of that language. It makes no sense to me. Don’t their parents care? With that much cussing, it is not like they stop when they get home - I am sure. They hardly knew any other words. They looked ignorant. And these are kids in high school.

It is a sad state of affairs when I wasn’t even shocked about this behavior. I was apalled, and I sure wish someone would take an interest in these kids before it is too late, but I wasn’t shocked. I wasn’t even surprised.

It is just a sad state of affairs in the world when this happens with such regularity that people are not surprised. On the other hand, I got congrats form the neighborhood for calling the cops. They want their park back, and we are organizing to have adults sit in the park and take up the space between 3 and 4:30 so the punks/teenagers don’t get to run it. Maybe if they don’t have somewhere to go they will go home. But it’s not like their parents are going to teach them good behavior.

I just think parents need to step up. It isn’t the school’s job to raise your kids - it is your job. You played the sex game - now you pay the price: raising your kids. If you don’t want to do it - then don’t have sex. But you did, now you cannot abandon them on society with no knowledge of proper behavior. Teach them, control them, set limits for them, and help them achieve. What these parents are doing will not help their children - it will only hinder them. How can you possibly have a child and not want the best for him or her? It doesn’t make sense to me, as a mother.

So for all those out there who are parents or want to be parents - raising kids is hard work and a full-time job. But it is your responsibility. They are your kids. So get to it and stop making people like me and my son victim’s of your kid’s bad behavior. Society doesn’t deserve that.